I woke up half way through the night,
Covered in crisp pieces, emptiness and fag ash,
I saw the broken flickering lights from the TV in the dark,
And my flat covered in trash,

I drank the dregs of yesterday’s beer,
Oh, and don’t worry I didn’t swallow the fag butt this time,
I pull my dishevelled body up to a seated position,
Mount depression being the hardest mountain to climb,

I breathe in,
Oxygen being one of the very few things I can actually afford,
I roll myself a rollie and spark up,
A small dose of addicted death being my reward.

I look at all the things I have to do today,
And work out how many I can actually ignore,
I make up some lame ass excuse,
Hit send, then drop my phone to the floor,

I manage a small broken smirk,
As tiny tears of pain travel down the ingrained rivulets of my face,
With no knowledge or interest of the time or even what day it is,
I drift back into the sleepy place,

With another day I woke up,
And another day that I wish I didn’t,
I rest in sleepy slumber,
Life and death being a daily intermittent,

And yes, I know it’s only a depression spell,
And I will hopefully be out of it soon,
But when you aim for the stars,
You gotta be prepared to land on the moon,

And talking of the moon,
The slaughtered sheep are jumping over it now,
So I’ll see you on the flipside,
Maybe…… somehow,

My words to the dictator of depression,
My words to the keeper of sleep,
I ask of you to take me away and take control,
As I am too broken and too weak,

Please take me far away from this land,
To a place that is neither land nor sea,
Take me far, far away,
Far away from everything that is me.

Wrote in the early hours of 17/07/2024